I am registered for the San Francisco Writer’s Conference.  I have six weeks to prepare.

I was originally going to attend a casual writer’s conference two months from now. It would be a practice run for the big conference coming in the summer. I would work on my pitch, meet other writers and soak up the atmosphere of the professional writer’s event. There would be speaker’s, classes, motivation, and camaraderie. This conference has been cancelled. The next closest in terms of time and place is two weeks earlier and a much bigger deal.

I want to do this. The challenge forces me to a new place in my writing…the deadline…and all this scary marketing stuff. I ache to have my manuscript-all four hundred ninety pages of it-revised so that I can see that I have done justice to the wonderful characters in my head. They deserve it after all I have put them through.

Now comes the marketing side. I need to know my manuscript backwards and forwards. The plot must be summarized to five pages, and  I have to have an oral pitch for agents and editors down to three minutes.  I am anxious and excited. I will finally get to pitch my novel to real live agents and editors.

It was already going to be a push, now I have two weeks less to prepare. In addition to polishing the first part of my book, I need to have a synopsis and a pitch written too. The pitch needs to be practiced until it’s perfect. I have to be able to lay it on my dream agent after stalking and cornering them in the elevator, bathroom or hotel bar. The opportunity for this may come at a moment’s notice.

A few nights ago, with scenes and corrections whirling around in my head, I held my dear babe while she whined and wailed. She didn’t want daddy, only me. I wondered if I was biting off more than I can chew. Possibly. Possibly going to make myself a little nuts…BUT… I won’t know for sure how nuts until after it is all over. By then I will have gained priceless experience and will be farther down the path to publication, ever more comfortable with the whole process of selling myself and my work.

Small things I did that made me crazy at the time in the form of extra running around; phone calls, emails sent, research done, setting up a website and blog, are starting to come back to me in a positive way. I see that if I had not made the preparations before now it would have been too late. I believe attending this conference is the same type of thing. I do not want five more years to pass by without taking action on my own behalf.

When I return from San Francisco, I will then have four more months in which to continue to polish the manuscript.  I will know how to act  when I face the agents and whomever else might make me tremble in my sensible shoes when I tell them in three minutes or less how extraordinary my characters are.

I am taking on a lot. Why do I do this to myself? Simple. If I don’t do it, it won’t get done. All this means is that I need to prioritize and be efficient, focused, and organized.

I am cutting it close though. Six…weeks. There’s lots to do and kids continue to need attention, especially the youngest. Every time I think we’re done with the all nighters and the incessant crying and rashes that come with teething it starts all over again. For the record we still have only four teeth. She is almost fifteen months old-the pill.

And to top it off, my mentor, the fabulous Corbin Lewars, is going on tour to promote her memoir, “Creating a Life”. This means I have only four week’s worth of access to her so I need to get cracking!

I am posting this so that everyone will know why I might not return calls, emails, tweets, or reciprocate Facebook posts.

The picture I have in my head is of my dear babe, intent on reaching a person or place several yards away. She will get down on all fours-the crawling is still more efficient for long distances-and without looking where she’s going, charge ahead as fast as her stubby hands and knees will carry her.

Please forgive me, if I do miss something important in your lives. It is not intentional. I would also ask for as many cheers of encouragement as you can muster. This is all done in pursuit of a most worthwhile dream.