I was able to stay at the hotel Saturday night because a friend of mine had to leave early and let me keep her room. I remembered right as I was falling asleep at 6 that I had turned my phone off during the awards dinner, and had left it off all night.

Sure enough, there was a text message from the sitter asking what time I wanted her to come over in the morning, and a missed call from my husband.

In the immortal words of a friend who shall remain nameless: “Shitfuck.”

Any time I have been off having a good time and I miss a call from my husband it can't mean anything good. This fine morning was no exception. Apparently he changed his mind and decided to come in to work Sunday morning. It sounds like he made this decision a while ago and assumed I knew. I thought when we discussed this and arranged the sitter; he was only working one weekend day. What. Ever. The bottom line was now that I had to get a hold of the sitter, and try to salvage the day. I spent the next half hour on that, got the sitter and then tried to fall back to sleep. I couldn’t, it was impossible. I should have just gone home then and there, but I didn’t want to give up. I was going to see Elizabeth Lyon no matter what I had to do, just like the Thursday seminar, this was something that must be done.

Except I was wiped out. Tired, sick from worry and guilt, and seriously annoyed. Three days on minimal sleep, plus no sleep the night before had finally caught up with me. I didn’t care anymore. My energy was now no longer focused on moving forward, I was focused on what was waiting for me at home, how unfair it was, blah, blah, blah. I told myself I had the book at home, and I had run in to her in the hallway the day before so I at least can say I got to meet her. At the time it seemed like an okay decision. I tried to sleep in but it didn’t happen.

I am bummed out and annoyed with myself, but I can’t go back. All I can do is move forward. Sunday I missed and will always regret it but overall I had the best conference experience ever. I got more information than I will be able to process in a month. I made friends that I will hopefully continue to learn from in the next year. I reveled in all the discussions of craft and came away inspired to be a better writer, and take some emphasis off of selling myself, at least for now. Platform is another topic I will cover soon.

Someone at the conference said this was just like being on a rollercoaster. I agree. It really is, and it is definitely one more way to thicken that tender writer’s skin. Whether you are feeling rejected by agents and editors, saying stupid things to someone “important,” overwhelmed with information,or meeting another writer who has the exact same experiences you have, you will get down. Then you have a great new insight that gives you hope, or hear just the right words of encouragement. That is part of the conference experience. Up and down, sideways, back and forth, we all experience it in some way, and find out we are all more alike than we would expect.

Lesson 2: Make sure you get enough sleep!